Knock, knock. Who's there? Eff off.
by, 03-12-2009 at 05:41 PM
To Hector, our new supervisor: eff off. You might be the biggest jerk I've ever met. I hate you, and you have no people skills. I know you are revered by many for your intelligence and smooth, shiny bald head, but I prefer to focus on your complete and utter douchiness. Thank you for coming to our department and bringing us into total chaos. Things used to run pretty smoothly, and now nobody can even find one simple effing file when it needs to be turned in. Thanks for nothing! Ever heard the phrase, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it"? Yeah, I didn't think you had. I look forward to watching you fail so thoroughly and completely, they send you back to your old position as collections supervisor in shame. Oh, and you're short. I hate little people.
To Charles, who can't get it throught your head that my name isn't Veronica, eff off. My name isn't Veronica. Although I may have mentioned it to you about 8 times, you still can't seem to get it. Are you slow or just forgetful? Well, either way, guess what, Rain Man? My name still isn't Veronica, and no matter how many times you call me that, it's not going to be.
To Dr. Djallalian, at the UCI ear nose and throat clinic: eff off. When you told me about this horrifically painful procedure that would traumatize me but restore the hearing in my right ear, I was terrified. I spent the last 3 weeks fluxuating between despair and complete and total terror of what you were going to do to me today. Wish you would have told me there was a chance it would start to correct itself, and saved me the trip. Now I have no pain, but guess what? I still can't hear, you useless quack. Why don't you take that tube camera you jammed up my nose, and shove it up your incompetent ***. Maybe you'll find your brain up there.
To Jessi's ex Chris: eff off. What kind of man wouldn't even bother to show up in court to fight for custody of his own children? Oh, you wouldn't know, you're no man at all, just a stupid boy. The best part of you is currently being raised by a kick-*** single mom and will probably never know what a useless tool their "father" (and I use the term loosely) really is. Your mother should have swallowed and saved the rest of us decent people the indignity of knowing that such a pathetic loser exists in the same space and time as us.
And MiceChat, thanks for losing this post the first time, and making me come back and relive my hate. :p