Love Fantasyland but think it needs a new dark ride or two? Really enjoy Critter Country but are bursting with ideas to spruce it up? Share them here! Basically, we all like Disneyland, I would assume..but we all have personal ideas and tastes too, so here's the place to let them shine! Take your favorite land, and describe how you'd optimize it for maximum fun! New rides, changing classic rides, new restaurants and stores, new character greeting spots, changing architecture...go wild and let your imagination soar!
I will get the ball rolling, and of course, my pick is New Orleans Square. A blast, right now, has two classic attractions and nearly endless ambiance. How would I make it better, you ask? Do let me share.....
SHOPPING: As with most of Disneyland, NoS currently suffers from what I call T.M.G.M-too much generic merchandise. Oust the pin store, oust the Nightmare store, close the second big Pirates store. Instead, bring back the kitchen goods/gourmet shop and Christmas store, and expand Pieces of 8 to feature a pirate "museum" featuring wax figures of notorious scallywags in the style of the ride, alongside reproductions of the old Pirate Arcade games.
DINING: To remain largely the same, no suggested changes for Club 33, French Market, Cafe Orleans, or Blue Bayou. Perhaps changing the bread bowl window next to Pirates might be in order: fresh made jambalaya, po' boys, beignets, etc, anyone?
DISNEY GALLERY: Evict the Dream Suite and bring it back to where it belongs
PIRATES: Now, I have no problem if Disney wishes to include some touches of the Pirates film franchise to this attraction. However, scaling back is in order. Leave the cursed chest of Aztec gold in the treasure scene, by all means, and Barbossa can still captain the Wicked Wench (minus shouting CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW every other line, please). The Davy Jones mist effect, impressive though it is, will be keel-hauled. If they simply must use this impressive technology, project a image of the talking skull from the beginning of the ride on it, and use the old "no fear have ye of evil curses" dialogue present from the ride's opening to the early 2000's. As for Jack himself...less is more. Take him away from the well-dunking scene and the end of the ride, and reinstate the skeletons on the lift-hill as you exit. He can remain popping out of the barrel, one appearance only, behind the "pooped pirate", but all dialogue referring to him should be removed. Let him be one of the pirates of the Caribbean, on equal footing with the rest, not the center of the ride.
HAUNTED MANSION: Through the same iron gates and up the walkway, you'd pass the some horse drawn hearse, now without the reins in front, the coffin inside slightly ajar, at night a eerie green mist just visible within. Next to it would be a small pond, circled with stones, behind a fence encircling it and the hearse. Moss and lily-pads would cover the surface, and a guest leaning in might occasionally see the suggestion of a human face appear briefly under the water, then vanish, eyes closed. Gone would be the pet cemetery, the walkway winding through it's former space, the crypts in the rear now supporting a hill-side cemetery with humorous human tombstones and cracked statues. Once inside, the Stretching Room would have received a aural makeover, the creaking and moaning noises of the Florida recent upgrade. All would be the same in the portrait hall, until you rounded the corner and found the doombuggies gliding through a fully furnished interior hallway, rather high ceiling, a curving stairway leading to a large picture window, illuminated by lightning. A few new portraits (members of the Sinister 11, from Florida) would hang on the walls, illuminated by dusty candelabra.
Once on the attraction, guests would need to be on their guard in case of appearance by the live Suit of Armor, waiting to startle them, or the newly restored screaming pop up heads in the attic, along with the new generation bride, face darkened save for glowing eyes, heart beating blood red in her chest, gleaming axe replacing the candle in her outstretched hand, and her groom, the ominous Hatbox Ghost, laughing in a familiar tone between beats of his bride's heart: the demented, gleeful cackle of screen legend Vincent Price, originally recorded for Phantom Manor. Next, down through the graveyard, where the pop-up heads have again been restored to their former glory, and out of the exit crypt to the mortal realm.
MUSEUM OF THE WEIRD/HAUNTED MANSION STORE: Taking up a large piece of riverside property (the current Harbor Galley building, smoking area, etc), guests exiting the Haunted Mansion could stop by and visit the Museum of the Weird. The exterior would be a wooden shack one might find alongside the river, delivery boxes stacked outside, bearing the names of exotic ports of call. Once inside, display cases would hold odd artifacts, masks from Africa, a man-eating plant, voodoo fetishes, strange Asian carvings, and more. Some of these, like a large gypsy cart painted with strange symbols, would move on their own and seem to come to life, as in the Adventurer's Club, formerly of Florida, or the enchanted Tiki Room. After touring the museum, guests could shop for ghoulish merchandise themed to the Haunted Mansion exclusively in a side room, containing more odd artifacts and eerie portraits lining the walls for decoration.
Your thoughts? And do, post your own ideas for your ideal Disneyland "land" makeover! Be creative and have fun with it!