ORWEN: Okay, ducklings, now before you go yelling at me for getting ahead of schedule around here, I just have to ask a Fantasyland type question in advance. I mean, I'm really hoping they do such a good job with RAPUNZEL that they'll have to build a tower for her--so that all you handsome hero types out there will have some hair to climb. But where in Fantasyland would it fit best? Is there even any room for Rapunzel to have a tower in there?
ORDDU: Actually, dear, if you stop to consider how Sleeping Beauty Castle was built roughly four years before Princess Aurora was awakened from her slumber to meet and greet Disneyland guests, your question isn't so premature as you might think. A tower in Fantasyland for Rapunzel would be quite the attraction and could be used by many a hunk who was in the mood to prove his manhood. Just imagine a long line of Tom Cruises, Chad Lowes, Keanu Reeves, Patrick Swayzee's, (sp?) Ben Aflecks and Brad Pitts' trying to show off their strengths and endurances by climbing up a long rope of my--I mean--Rapunzel's hair!! The reward for reaching the top would have to be a kiss from the damsel waiting and rooting for them at the top. The only thing I ask is that--just once--Rapunzel would call in sick for a day and allow me to be the one handing out the kisses.
ORGOCH: Weren't it bad 'nuff that the prince in the story a Rappin' Rapunzel got scared ta death by a witch 'n went blind when she pushed him out the winda? Soon as some jerk climbed up all that phoney hair--only ta see another hag, like yerself, ya can bet he'd go blind on the spot soon as he saw an ugly mug like yers!
ORWEN: (sigh) All I wanted to know is where the best fit for Rapunzel's tower would go in Fantasyland, ducklings. Any ideas???