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  1. #1

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    Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Monday my daughter went back to school whereas I had the day off. Normally my mother picks her up afterwards but I did this time. Well there is this spot where most moms get out their car and wait for their kids and I parked my car and walked on over.

    So there were a few other mothers standing there and I was making polite conversation with them. After a few minutes this mother looks over at me and goes,

    SUB: "I haven't seen you around here before I'm Mrs. Stuck up Beach, and you are?"

    Me: " Hello, my name is Summer and I'm here picking up my daughter, today I am off work and I don't normally get a chance to."

    SUB: (She makes this face and goes) "Oh, your one of THOSE mothers who work during the day instead of staying home with their children.

    Me: "Actually I have no choice being a single mom and all, I have to work during the day because any other time I would have no one to watch her."

    SUB: "Oh your a single mom!! Oh well then thats okay....

    And then she turns and starts talking to another mom.

    I was like, HELllllllo....who the hell do you think you are! (In my head of course) What if I WAS a working mother and married, how rude of her to be so judgmental about it!

    Has anyone else ran into these psycho mothers who think that a womans place is in the home and anyone who disagrees is BAD!.

    No offense to our resident SAHM's, I have tremendous respect for you for doing what you do, its just not in my personality to stay at home all day regardless if I'm married or not. LOL
    Last edited by SummerInFL; 01-04-2006 at 11:49 AM.

  2. #2

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by SummerInFL
    SUB: "I haven't seen you around here before I'm Mrs. Stuck up Beach, and you are?"
    This here almost made me spit out the sip of Coke I just took!

    I don't come across this very often but I think that's because most everyone around here that I hang around don't have kids and if they do, they work with me. We did have the school principal once tell us, "So, daycare is raising your kids?" Um, no, daycare is helping to raise our kids but they aren't doing it for us, jerkwad. I don't think I'd be a very good stay at home Mom, although I'd love to have enough money to try sometimes. I think it is fabulous when Mom's do stay home, even when their kids are already off to school. I think it's great when women work. I really don't believe that it's how much time you spend with your kids, but the quality of that time, that shapes the person they are becoming.

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
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  3. #3

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    i never could understand why...when us women have so much in this world against us..we will attack each other on our work inside/outside the home issue! that woman was sooooooo wrong!

    i've had it exactally on the opposite end of the coin...
    conversation while hanging out w/ hubby & his wind-surfing group
    misguided idiot "so nan..what do you do"
    me "I stay home w/ my kids"
    misguided idiot-complete w/ disdainful look & hand on her hip " and you're OKAY with that?!"

    i had never felt more belittled.

    ff to this Dec. 26. at her home.... we're saying our goodbye's & her hubby says to the both of us.. "well...back to work eh?" ... then he corrects himself & says "oh, not you nan..i forgot... you don't work" , I spun around, looked him straight in the eye ( mind you..this is in a mixed crowd of people).. and said LOUDLY "I do too work!!" he looks right back and says "oh yeah? where" I then said " In the laundry room, in the bathrooms, in the kitchen, in the living room..." at this point.... 2 other women in the room stood up & began clapping loudly! it was wonderful!

  4. #4

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by pixywingz
    ff to this Dec. 26. at her home.... we're saying our goodbye's & her hubby says to the both of us.. "well...back to work eh?" ... then he corrects himself & says "oh, not you nan..i forgot... you don't work" , I spun around, looked him straight in the eye ( mind you..this is in a mixed crowd of people).. and said LOUDLY "I do too work!!" he looks right back and says "oh yeah? where" I then said " In the laundry room, in the bathrooms, in the kitchen, in the living room..." at this point.... 2 other women in the room stood up & began clapping loudly! it was wonderful!
    Well I am sorry the guy said that to you however I do how you handled it. LOL

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Thank you...thank you very much!

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    Smile Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    No question if the children are loved and well-cared for, GREAT. There's a lot to be said for happy, well adjusted parents and for some that means working in the home, for others, outside the home.

    Much of my childhood, my Mom worked. I never felt ignored or unloved. On the contrary, I think we had one of the best family units among our friends and relatives.

    My partner and I, both being guys, might not be seen by every person as the ideal parent figures. One of my nieces told me after she became an adult that of all the adult roll models she and her sister had growing up, we were the best roll model for how a couple should work.

    This isn't an original thought, it's from an old novel which I forget. “If it's love, the Lord won't mind, there's enough hate in the world.” Tell those busy bodies to take all that judgement they have for others and use that energy to make their children's lives better.
    "Not Carnegie, Vanderbilt, and Astor together could have
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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    A lot of people can't handle the idea that some other person might make a different choice than they themselves made.

    Thus, the SAHMs mock the working moms, and the working moms mock the ones at home.

    Sad, really. We all have reasons for our choices.
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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    SUB mom probably drives an SUV too

    I'm a SAHM that wishes I could work!!! I did work full time until child #1 was 3.5 yrs old (My mom was not working and could watch him) Now my mother and MIL work full time so there is no one to help with watching the kids those 80-90 days a year when there is no school or sick/snow days...

    When I got preggo w/child #2 and saw the costs of day care DH and me decided to live without a lot of luxuries and live on one income. It's not always easy but it's the choice we made. I'd rather be here EVERY minute for them and take them to all their after school activities rather than have them stuck in after care programs til 6pm and no time for them to be kids...

    My mom worked all the time but she was a single mom too and had no choice.

    I hope to one day get back into the work force just so my daughter knows that moms really CAN DO IT ALL ~ I also encourage her to find a profession that will allow her to have it all one day.

    You always think the grass is greener on the other side but its not always so.

    GO SAHM'S!!! & GO WM's!!!!!!

    Woman should never attack one another over this subject!!!!
    ~~~~~~

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by DMof2
    SUB mom probably drives an SUV too
    Hey!


    Kidding!

    Woman should never attack one another over this subject!!!!
    Amen woman.

    And, for the record:

    I would hate to have a job outside the home because I'm chronically late; I'd never last in the workforce.
    Also, I don't know anyone who would cart my four precious darlings around to various extracurricular activities and appointments--at least not someone I could afford!

    Also, I like being able to go to awards assemblies on short notice, help out in class on a flexible schedule, and be able to pick them up when they get sick at school. I feel blessed to be able to do this and think it's just RUDE to belittle someone else for their family's choices or situation.
    I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it.
    That explains the trouble that I'm always in...

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Unfortunately when people are insecure they put others down to make themselves feel better.

    The only "right" way is what is best for you and your family.

    I've been a DINK (total workaholic to boot), then a stay at home mom for three years, then a single mom of two (a baby under one and a toddler with developmental delays), single-working mother of same two children, then I remarried and was fortunate enough stop working outside the home fulltime. I worked at home (babysitting, pampered chef, avon, parttime at the bank handling customer service when the kids were in school, and for the past six years doing transcription) to contribute financially.

    I loved being a SAHM when my daughters were babies. I was not bored (who can be bored with a cute baby in the house?), I had no desire to work. They were enough work and very fulfilling to say the least.

    I remember my SIL saying (before she had kids) in that oh-so-much-better-than-you aire, "I could never JUST stay home. I would be soooo bored." It stung.

    Some of us may need to work to put a roof over our heads and food and the table, there is no shame in that. Some of us may work when the kids are in school because we enjoy working and making money, there is no shame in that. Some of us may have worked really hard to achieve a certain profession and working is essential to keep fresh in the field, there is no shame in that. Some of us may be perfectly happy staying home and raising our kids. Time goes by so quickly and they grow up fast. We have the rest of our lives to work. There is no shame in that either.

    The shame comes from some Mrs. Stuck Up Beach thinking her way is the only right way and the rest of us are fools. I feel sorry for people like her, they are missing out. They are narrow minded and self serving. She could be getting to know someone very special, but her attitude has closed that door. Snobs are just that...snobs.

    I've entertained what it would be like to not work. To send the kids off each day with nothing to worry about but getting my nails done, doing yoga, going to lunch and shopping. I would like it for, oh, maybe a day. It is just not me. Or maybe, staying home and cleaning house until it shined and had a nice, hot meal ready at 5:00, that is not me either. I like clean, but it does get tiresome...and cooking can be monotonous, too. I know too well about working and coming home tired and having to fix dinner, doing all my errands on the weekends. I'm grateful that I can work at home all day and be tired and not have to fix dinner (because the family saw me working hard and they fixed dinner). This situation works for our family now, it may not work ten years from now, but for now it does.

    Truthfully, being a mom is the best "JOB" in the world. And as the old saying goes, "Every mother is a working mother."

    MeiMei, who has been interrupted numerous times by her family while trying to type this out...grrrr...
    Boo!

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    The title of this thread made me think there was gonna be Jell-O wrestling.
    I find it hard
    It's hard to find
    Oh well, whatever, nevermind

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by LightBeer
    The title of this thread made me think there was gonna be Jell-O wrestling.
    Give it time. SunnyG will be here later.
    I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it.
    That explains the trouble that I'm always in...

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    yeah...I can't stand the holier than thou' stay at home moms. (and I know not every sahm is like that...just most of the ones I have come across.).. ...I have great difficulty holding conversations with them, we just have very different interests. I wouldn't even have walked over to them. One...I'm shy and two i would have nothing to say to them...LOL

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennidisneyfer
    Give it time. SunnyG will be here later.
    I love how jell-o wrestling gets brought up and the first person to come to mind is SunnyG

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    Re: Stay At Home Moms Vs Working Moms

    Quote Originally Posted by disneymeimei
    I've entertained what it would be like to not work. To send the kids off each day with nothing to worry about but getting my nails done, doing yoga, going to lunch and shopping.




    I think after my last one's in school, I'm gonna do THIS. I'll call it my early retirement party.
    I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it.
    That explains the trouble that I'm always in...

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