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  1. #46

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    As a special ed teacher I disagree with both the notion that kids are over-identified and that kids are under-identified with ADHD or ADD or even Autism, for that matter. I think for a while kids were over identified, but I don't find that to be true anymore.

    ADD and ADHD do not have a special ed label anyway, so it's not like a teacher can diagnose a kid with it. And there's no blood test for any of it, but when a child has it, they have it. It would be obvious to any doctor or parent. There are borderline kids, definitely, but daaaaang spend five minutes with a kid who isn't, and those borderline kids are looking pretty dang good.

    We've gone back and forth about Cassidy and ADD or even Asperger's. We have ADD/ADHD alllll over in my family--cousins and uncles, probably even a little bit me--and she has always been quite a bit different. It hasn't affected her negatively in her schoolwork or with her friends, but she's definitely gotten more emotional and has had some outbursts and crying jags already. There's a social-communication breakdown somewhere....and life is a little harder for her, but she's just now becoming aware of it.

    As she gets older, it'll be a bit more obvious (socially, especially) and perhaps she'll need some help. Whether its an actual medical diagnosis and a subsequent plan at school or just some counseling and help with social skills, I don't know. I guess we'll see. But it's been consistent throughout her life and sometimes I feel really sad for her. Which is ironic, because she's the happiest little girl on earth. She's also the most oblivious child on earth. She's awesome.

    I have had ADD concerns about my oldest daughter since she was in first grade....and she's powered through okay so far. She forgets assignments, loses her homework, still can't manage to do her chores, loses her train of thought constantly.....my concerns haven't gone away, but she's the very top student in her grade and adored by all, even if she drives her teachers CRAZY so so far we're doing things right. She's going to start switching classes this year and carrying an assignment book to help her stay on task. We'll see how it goes.

    Both of my girls are in TAG.....the gifted program.....and that helps as well. They don't get bored as much, which helps them pay a bit more attention than they'd normally be able to.

    The attention thing.....when it's obvious, it's obvious. The lack of hyperactivity makes it harder for parents to identify though. But it's more common for girls to have ADD and go unidentified until adulthood than most people realize.

  2. #47

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by All Aglow
    I'm assuming these comments are towards Dsnylndmom and myself? So, I'm answering as if they are! And before I start, I am not offended in any way, whatsoever.
    I haven't read either of your responses yet (I will), I just saw this^ and HAD to say something.

    What I said was NOT in ANY way directed at anyone. I was speaking purely in generalities. I do not have a child in that situation at this point, and therefore only base my opinions on the information I have heard and read.

    I think absolutely every case is different and there is no blanket treatment. Each parent has to decide what is best for there own child and I am sure every mother here has done there best to ensure they are taking the proper route.

    I only hope that parents look into alternative methods of treatment besides simply medicating. Sounds like you all have done that. I just think that some parents just take the word of school officials/doctors and do what they say when they don't necessarily have to. For those who are not parents of said child, medication is often the easy route. And that was pretty much my point.

    I only have a 3 year old who is basically an so I look up to you moms who have more kids at older ages because that is when motherhood becomes truly challenging and I only hope to be as good a mom as many of you seem to be when that time comes for me!
    “In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” -Michael Jackson



  3. #48

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Wow, I just read both "novettes"

    I totally agree with you both. All aglow, sounds like you have really done your research and have tried on your own to determine what the issues are with your daughter's behavior. I commend you for that. She really actually sounds like a fascinating child. Wouldn't you just love to get inside her brain sometime and see what she is thinking to herself?

    Dsnylndmom, I think you absolutely did the right thing by refusing to medicate your son. You followed your instincts and that is what all moms should do because we know our kids best. And it sounded like you were right.

    My point was the same as yours:
    Quote Originally Posted by dsnylndmom
    Anyways, what I was trying to get at was to get to know your kid first. If you choose to medicate it should be YOUR decision, not the teacher's, not your MIL's but YOURS and your doctors.
    I have no issue with using medication to treat a child with ADD or ADHD as long as it is actually treating the child and not being used unnecessarily or as behavior modification (which I have heard of-scary!).
    “In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” -Michael Jackson



  4. #49

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    TinkPink, sorry my comment about the other comments being directed at us were to Barbaraann's post, not yours, LOL! Only because she quoted D-mom but I thought she was replying to both of our comments. I really, really don't get offended by anything you both said, not one bit. Mostly because I know that most Mom's will agree that nobody knows their child like a Mom does, both of you said that.

    I can't agree more, Autumn is a fascinating child and I'd LOVE to get into her head and understand her even better. That fascination is mostly good but it has it's bad parts, too, the current worst being the emotional outbursts. Just this morning she was crying her head off, you'd think she broke her leg or something, I jumped out of bed and ran in there and it was only because her older sister said something she didn't like. Yikes! But she really just keeps us on our toes, keeps us in hilarious stories to tell about her. My favorite two are the time she climbed the 6-foot high chain link fence at daycare, balanced on top on her feet, and jumped and hit the ground running on the other side. The poor teacher didn't know whether to climb after her or run to the other end of the fence and use the gate. The other is the day she was eating lunch and she got up and in such a serious tone of voice said, "Dad, I think I'm losing my powers." and walked off. WTH?!

    Stinkerbell, I had no idea you were so knowledgeable about such things. I wish you could meet her now! The way you describe your daughter is so much like Autumn. The social-communication breakdown, happiest child on earth, most oblivious - that is SO her. And as she gets older, it does become more of a concern. But that kid, how I love her so! I can't imagine her any other way - and I'm glad for that.

    I am just reminded... a few years ago we went to my husband's Grandfather's funeral. He was about 29 at the time, I think, and we met one of his cousins who was in his late 40's. Anyway, that cousin had a son who was barely over 2 years old, maybe 2 years and 3 months. They had the child on Ritalin?! HOW can you possibly do that? What doctor okay's that? Now, I didn't know the kid before that, maybe he really needed it but my mind has the hardest time grasping a child that young having been that much of a problem that he needed to be medicated already. But, like I said, I didn't know them before so what do I know, really? Still, I found it really sad.

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
    — Mark Twain





  5. #50

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by All Aglow
    TinkPink, sorry my comment about the other comments being directed at us were to Barbaraann's post, not yours, LOL!
    Okay, I wasn't sure, I just wanted to clarify!
    Quote Originally Posted by All Aglow
    The other is the day she was eating lunch and she got up and in such a serious tone of voice said, "Dad, I think I'm losing my powers." and walked off. WTH?!
    That is the funniest thing I have ever heard. My latest funny story with my son isn't AS funny but it had my husband and I rolling with laughter so I'll share. We were in a resaturant and my son picked up his spoon and started tapping it on the table. I told him to stop and that it was impolite to tap on the table with his utensils like that. He looked at me with puppy-dog eyes and said, "But I feel a song coming on!" We were like, Huh??? We laughed for like 5 straight minutes, it was so funny. He is always saying things like that and I don't know where he gets them.
    “In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” -Michael Jackson



  6. #51

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by All Aglow
    The other is the day she was eating lunch and she got up and in such a serious tone of voice said, "Dad, I think I'm losing my powers." and walked off. WTH?!
    I swear ^^ that is my favorite Autumn story of all time. You know she really reminds me of Lilo with her dry sense of humor.

    Shawn on the other hand is Stitch

    Quote Originally Posted by TinkPink
    We were in a resaturant and my son picked up his spoon and started tapping it on the table. I told him to stop and that it was impolite to tap on the table with his utensils like that. He looked at me with puppy-dog eyes and said, "But I feel a song coming on!" .
    That is SO CUTE!!!!!

    Now I feel compelled to share my latest Favorite Shawn Moment, I posted it in the DMCA but I think it got buried and I don't remember if it was 1 or 2

    I was watching Anchorman the other day and Shawn walked in during Ron Burgandy's issues with his "crotchal" area, aka the ginormous erection part. Fast forward a couple of days and Shawn comes out of the bathroom and he's standing there pushing down on his "crotchal" region. I asked him what he was doing and he said "I don't want it sticking out like on Anchorman"
    It was freakin' hilarious.



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  7. #52

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by TinkPink
    That is the funniest thing I have ever heard. My latest funny story with my son isn't AS funny but it had my husband and I rolling with laughter so I'll share. We were in a resaturant and my son picked up his spoon and started tapping it on the table. I told him to stop and that it was impolite to tap on the table with his utensils like that. He looked at me with puppy-dog eyes and said, "But I feel a song coming on!" We were like, Huh??? We laughed for like 5 straight minutes, it was so funny. He is always saying things like that and I don't know where he gets them.
    LMBO - hey when the feeling hits you, it hits you! Has he seen Toy Story 2, doesn't the penguin say that at the end? He's too adorable, gotta love that! Then you just want to let them do it, even though you just told them that they can't - LOL!

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
    — Mark Twain





  8. #53

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by dsnylndmom
    Now I feel compelled to share my latest Favorite Shawn Moment, I posted it in the DMCA but I think it got buried and I don't remember if it was 1 or 2

    I was watching Anchorman the other day and Shawn walked in during Ron Burgandy's issues with his "crotchal" area, aka the ginormous erection part. Fast forward a couple of days and Shawn comes out of the bathroom and he's standing there pushing down on his "crotchal" region. I asked him what he was doing and he said "I don't want it sticking out like on Anchorman"
    It was freakin' hilarious.
    I can TOTALLY see and hear him doing and saying this! They remember everything, don't they?

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
    — Mark Twain





  9. #54

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    The Boy and Hubby are off to Home Depot to buy some 2x4's to repair the fence The Boy broke. Hubby's dad gave The Boy a gas powered golf cart some time back. Hubby got it running today. I stopped watching after they nearly hit one of our trees. Hubby just came in to tell me that part of the fence is broken cuz The Boy didn't take a turn wide enough. they are having a great time tearing up the back yard.

    *sigh* Boys and their toys.

    The funniest part was watching the dog. PoohDog sat with me with Hubby was behind the wheel. As soon as he saw The Boy behind the wheel he ran for cover.

  10. #55

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Grrrr... Now they are playing Star Wars in my living room!!!!

    Oh, and after fixing the fence someone did some serious donuts in the yard... They are both blaming each other-I think the big kid did it.

  11. #56

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by Mousey Girl
    Grrrr... Now they are playing Star Wars in my living room!!!!

    Oh, and after fixing the fence someone did some serious donuts in the yard... They are both blaming each other-I think the big kid did it.
    Sorry, but this cracks me up! I can so see them standing there pointing at each other in total denial!! I'd go with it being the big kid, too, knowing mine as I do.

    Yesterday, my oldest started middle school... that was rough once I realized that she has a real desk like in high school now, the kind attached to the chair with the little basket underneath. She has a homeroom, a locker, changes classes and everything. HOW did that happen??

    My middle one started first grade and just looked so much more grown up than she did last year when we dropper her off. I'm really hoping this will be her year that things come together and she gets her emotions more in control.

    The little one, she wore her new jeans this morning and just looked so grown up! Last night, after her bath, I put a French braid in her hair and she looked too old so I yanked it right back out, LOL! She was mad at me but eventually decided she is still my baby. She always says she's my baby and Daddy's boo-boo - gotta love that little cuddle monster!

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
    — Mark Twain





  12. #57

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Yesterday, Chloe farted. LOUDLY. Then she sigh and said, "Ahhhhh......." And then she took a gigantic whiff and says, "Mmmm.....smells like latte!"


  13. #58

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    My son is 2 1/2 and gave me his first insult the other day. He came up to me, gave me a big hug, and then said loudly, "PU! You smell like pickles!" Thank goodness we were at home. My husband about died laughing. I made him check to be sure I didn't stink, but wonder... When is going to start saying things like that to strangers? Uh-oh.
    Last edited by lafantasma; 08-18-2005 at 09:38 AM. Reason: Changed wording for clarification

  14. #59

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Hey there, lafantasma!!! If he's anything like my youngest (4), it will be anyday now! Beware of the public humiliations!

    She's even reached into the back of pants when I was in line at Starbucks and pulled on my G-string and snapped it. In front of people.

    She humiliates us constantly. We call her Splenda.....cause she's fake sweet.

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    Re: Have kids? Let's chat about them here...

    Quote Originally Posted by stinkerbell
    Yesterday, Chloe farted. LOUDLY. Then she sigh and said, "Ahhhhh......." And then she took a gigantic whiff and says, "Mmmm.....smells like latte!"


    I can so see this, that's hilarious! Although, now if I ever drink a latte, it's all I will think about. Uh...yum?!

    "Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you've never been hurt and live like it's heaven on Earth."
    — Mark Twain





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