Results 1 to 12 of 12

Thread: No strings....

  1. #1

    • Material Girl
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    176

    No strings....

    Hmmmm...so things finally got moving with the guy I've kind of liked for a while over the weekend. All good. However, we're now trying to work out exactly what that now means. We're sort of at the stage where (at least to start with) it will kind of be a "no strings" kind of thing, which suits both of us pretty well. I've just come out of a long relationship, so I'm kind of loath to settle down straight away, and he's kind of younger and not sure what he wants in terms of a relationship. Add to that we're both pretty busy, and it makes even more sense. The only thing is, this is pretty new to me. In the past (pretty much all my adult life) I've been a relationship kind of girl.

    Anyone been in this situation before or have some words of wisdom to impart?

  2. #2

    • rainy day girl
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    walking in the rain
    Posts
    8,436
    Blog Entries
    68

    Re: No strings....

    I've been involved in one of these "no strings" relationships. They're not all they're cracked up to be. It's a nice way of saying he wants to screw you and anyone else he wants. That works for some people, I guess, but in my experience, one person ends up getting their feelings hurt at some point. Do you like him? If you like him enough to sleep with him, can you stand the thought of him doing the same things he does with you with a bunch of other girls? I'm kind of territorial when it comes to my men. I don't like to share.
    Looking for the truth about giraffes? http://www.menacinggiraffes.blogspot.com/

  3. #3

    • That Guy
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Wizard Sleeve
    Posts
    4,572

    Re: No strings....

    Just make sure you both have clear expectations and rules, and you're on the same page. Typically, sooner or later someone gets more vested in the relationship, and that is when feelings can be hurt.

    Best of luck!

  4. #4

    • That Guy
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Wizard Sleeve
    Posts
    4,572

    Re: No strings....

    Quote Originally Posted by sunnygirl
    I've been involved in one of these "no strings" relationships. They're not all they're cracked up to be. It's a nice way of saying he wants to screw you and anyone else he wants. That works for some people, I guess, but in my experience, one person ends up getting their feelings hurt at some point. Do you like him? If you like him enough to sleep with him, can you stand the thought of him doing the same things he does with you with a bunch of other girls? I'm kind of territorial when it comes to my men. I don't like to share.

    As usual, well put.

  5. #5

    • Material Girl
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    176

    Re: No strings....

    Quote Originally Posted by sunnygirl
    I've been involved in one of these "no strings" relationships. They're not all they're cracked up to be. It's a nice way of saying he wants to screw you and anyone else he wants. That works for some people, I guess, but in my experience, one person ends up getting their feelings hurt at some point. Do you like him? If you like him enough to sleep with him, can you stand the thought of him doing the same things he does with you with a bunch of other girls? I'm kind of territorial when it comes to my men. I don't like to share.
    Yeah, see, this is the thing I'm (vaguely) worried about. You've put it well. Thank you.

  6. #6

    • Man O Lantern
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    It's fall, ya'll!
    Posts
    8,484

    Re: No strings....

    Oh man. I've had one successful "no strings" relationship...successful in that I wasn't the one who was more emotionally vested.

    I have no idea if he thinks it was a successful "no strings" relationship since the last time he saw me, he ran out of the room crying.

    Just kidding.

    But really.....I came out unscathed and cherished the fun times and friendship that we shared and when I wanted to move on, I did. It seemed like the ball was always in my court.

    But there are more times than I can count that my friends did not come out unscathed in a similar relationship...but those are relationships that they look back on fondly....and they look back...because none of those relationships went anywhere. Interestingly enough, no regrets though!

    Take what you can from the experience, with no expectations. The second you start putting your expectations on someone else, that's when you're bound to get hurt.

    Be careful with your heart, sweet girl.

    ~Claire

  7. #7

    • Gay Man
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Long Beach
    Posts
    3,425

    Re: No strings....

    Once. Never again.

    I'm really into monogamy - maybe because I know what a terrible thing a non-monogomous relationship can be.

    I went through a slut period when I was younger and was fine with it - but I knew what my goals were, and it wasn't a relationship at that point. But, sport shagging is fine for fun until those nasty things like feelings get introduced and trouble begins. Or, at least that's been my experience.

  8. #8

    • rainy day girl
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    walking in the rain
    Posts
    8,436
    Blog Entries
    68

    Re: No strings....

    Quote Originally Posted by stinkerbell
    Take what you can from the experience, with no expectations. The second you start putting your expectations on someone else, that's when you're bound to get hurt.
    The only problem I've found in having no expectations is this: When you have no expectations, you get exactly what you expect: Nothing. You deserve better than that, in my opinion. What's wrong with having expectations and standards and saying, "I want more?"

    Quote Originally Posted by stinkerbell
    Be careful with your heart, sweet girl.
    Yeah, what she said.
    Looking for the truth about giraffes? http://www.menacinggiraffes.blogspot.com/

  9. #9

    • Smells like beer
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Monkey Sex
    Posts
    4,639

    Re: No strings....

    Quote Originally Posted by stinkerbell
    the last time he saw me, he ran out of the room crying.
    The hole in my heart is still there.
    Last edited by LightBeer; 08-15-2005 at 09:27 PM. Reason: spelled hole wrong, DUUURRPPPP!!!
    I find it hard
    It's hard to find
    Oh well, whatever, nevermind

  10. #10

    • MiceChat Moderator
    • It's SisterP Time!
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Bozeman, Montana, United States
    Posts
    8,666
    Blog Entries
    9

    Re: No strings....

    I agree with stinkerbell, be very careful with your heart.
    And Sunnyg is wise as ever, you deserve more than to have actually no expectations.
    Its hard to tell you what to do- just make sure you can be happy with no regrets.

  11. #11

    • That Guy
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Wizard Sleeve
    Posts
    4,572

    Re: No strings....

    This request goes out to LightBeer.....


    I walk along the city streets you used to walk along with me
    And every step I take reminds me of just how we used to be
    Well, how can I forget you, girl?
    When there is always something there to remind me
    Always something there to remind me

    As shadows fall, I pass a small cafe where we would dance at night
    And I can't help recalling how it how it felt to kiss and hold you tight
    Well, how can I forget you, girl?
    When there is always something there to remind me
    Always something there to remind me

    I was born to love her, and I will never be free
    You'll always be a part of me

    If you should find you miss the sweet and tender love we used to share
    Just go back to the places where we used to go, and I'll be there
    Well, how can I forget you, girl?
    When there is always something there to remind me
    Always something there to remind me

    I was born to love her, and I will never be free
    You'll always be a part of me

    'Cause there is always something there to remind me
    Always something there to remind me
    Always something there to remind me

  12. #12

    • My cuties!
    • Offline

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    WA state
    Posts
    3,576

    Re: No strings....

    Be careful with your heart, sweet girl.
    Well put!!!

Similar Threads

  1. No strings attached card
    By Momeraths in forum Disneyland Resort
    Replies: 39
    Last Post: 04-24-2008, 10:30 AM
  2. Woody and Jesse Pull Strings?
    By SellnACURA in forum Disneyland Resort
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 09-01-2007, 12:56 PM
  3. Replies: 2
    Last Post: 05-13-2007, 03:27 PM
  4. When will Disney next tug at our heart strings?
    By dsnyfnatic in forum Disneyland Resort
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 11-02-2006, 10:52 PM
  5. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-29-2005, 02:34 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •