Happy birthday, Brian! Great day for a birthday, I think!
Marge: Barnacle Bill's Home Pregnancy Test? Homer, shouldn't we have gone with a better-known brand?
Homer: But Marge, this one came with a corn-cob pipe!
Marge: [reading from the test box] "Ahoy, Maties! If the water turns blue, a baby for you! If purple ye see, no baby thar be!"
Homer: So, which is it? Blue or purple?
Marge: "If ye test should fail, to a doctor set sail!"