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  1. #1

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    Foot in your mouth

    So how does that foot taste? Any stories of when you said something awfull and bad to someone accidentally and was totally humiliated?
    Marge: Barnacle Bill's Home Pregnancy Test? Homer, shouldn't we have gone with a better-known brand?
    Homer: But Marge, this one came with a corn-cob pipe!
    Marge: [reading from the test box] "Ahoy, Maties! If the water turns blue, a baby for you! If purple ye see, no baby thar be!"
    Homer: So, which is it? Blue or purple?
    Marge: Pink.
    Homer: D'oh!
    Marge: "If ye test should fail, to a doctor set sail!"

  2. #2

    • And they call me Mad!
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    I asked a girl named Stacy if her mom "Had it going on" and she replied that her mother was dead...kinda awkward...
    What an idiot....

    Yeah, I do that Twitter thing.


  3. #3

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    I am sorry my dear Tui, but that is the world's worst pick up line- I hope the expereince taught you never to use it again!
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  4. #4

    • And they call me Mad!
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    Oh beleive me I wasn't trying to pick her up, I was just being stupid and the song was popular at the time.
    What an idiot....

    Yeah, I do that Twitter thing.


  5. #5

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    ah- I just made the connection. I swear- the peroxide has fried my brain. Either that, or God forbid, I am pregnant, I heard that is a brain cell killer as well.
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  6. #6

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    Athlete's tongue... Foot in Mouth desease...

    Had my fair share of those... Many of them are to complex to explain...

    Usually they have to do with me confusing the names of people...
    Check out my other blog:

  7. #7

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    Okay I have one.

    We were at a family gathering over Xmas this year and were playing a game. I can't remember what specifics the game was but we had to guess what the person was trying to get us to guess. He gave this clue: "A name most people would hate to have" and I yelled out "Mildred!!"

    OMG I had totally forgotten that was Great grandma's name who had died 2 yrs ago. Everyone just looked at me. No one said anything. I am surprised I am still allowed in the house...Bad Bad moment.
    “In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.” -Michael Jackson



  8. #8

    • Smells like beer
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    never
    I find it hard
    It's hard to find
    Oh well, whatever, nevermind

  9. #9

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    WHen I went on my south island tour with all the exchange students, on one of our final nights we got really really drunk, and there was the one Canadian chick that wasnt too bad looking, and she had this alaskan guy that was trying very hard to get her, but it was obvious that he had no chance. So we were sitting there and I was talking to the canadian girl and I was saying how I thought it was funny that this guy kept trying to get her and I was joking about how he had no chance at all. Well the next morning I woke up went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, the alaskan guy was standing there and gave me a dirty look. And just kinda Harumphed and walked away, so I yelled to him "Are you mad at me?" and he yelled back "Why wouldn't I be?" so I shouted back " I take that as a yes!" anyway he heard the whole thing, because he was apparently right next to the canadian girl while I was blabbing, so later on I apologized he forgave me, I won him a troll doll in one of those claw machines, and we never mentioned it again
    What an idiot....

    Yeah, I do that Twitter thing.


  10. #10

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    Had a boss that was clueless about computer programming. She was an English major and could write a great status report, but too bad it was all BS goblity gook, and worse was that her boss didn't know the difference.

    One time at a status meeting I brought up a problem I was having with a piece of code, and asked if anyone had any ideas.... She blurts in with a suggestion that showed just how ignorant she was.....

    So, after explaining to her just how far off she was, she assured me I should try her solutions.... So I say, "Okay, I'll try it. But does anyone have any GOOD suggestions?" Didn't realize just how strongly I stressed GOOD until I saw the anger on her face and everyone else trying to supress their laughter.

    6 months later I got a horrid review. 3 months after that I had a much better job in the same company. 3 months after that she was "promoted" into a paperwork position because no one would work for her.

  11. #11

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    One time as I was leaving the park a fellow guest approached me and asked me where he could find the nearest hamburger stand...I responded with the age old "friend, a hamburger is the last thing you need!"
    I guess I didn't really put my foot in my mouth, he put it in there for me.

  12. #12

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    Me and my aunt were discussing baby names a while ago... In the middle of my rant, I blurted out how I hated it when people call their kids things like "Tim" without bothering to officially name them fully "Timothy". At which point it dawned on me that her son is called "Tim"... I have sooo many bad stories with people who have kids. I'm really no good with them. I'm Miranda before Brady but without the maternal instinct to make me change into a parent out of nowhere. Plus I seem to have no concept of child-friendliness, illustrated by you-know-what.

  13. #13

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    When I first met my wife, we were at her parents haning out and were talkign about something and I said "I can't standpeopel that chew or dip tobacoo(sp), it's nasty the way they spit all over the place."


    Nedless to say I looked over and for the first tiem realised her dad had a big wad in his cheek. :o :o

  14. #14

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    I say the man had it coming. No need to be embarrassed about that one... Yeeech.

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