Just curious how you all deal with giving your condolences when someone you know has a relative/person close to them that has died.
I got an email from a friend today that his dad died last night. He’s been sick and so it was a blessing. He seems to actually be doing quite well and all, accepting that he led a long happy prosperous life and hasn’t been healthy lately.
I remember back in college I was taking a psychology class and I’ll never forget what the professor said, and to me it actually makes sense. She said never tell someone you are “sorry” because, what are you sorry for? Always use the word "sorry" when you are apologizing for something, never in this context. The best thing to say is “If there’s anything I can do let me know” and mean it. If you’ve been through a death of a person close to you, offer your shoulder. Tell them you know what it’s like to loose a (insert person here i.e. parent, sibling etc) and then give them some hints of what to expect.
This seems to be the thing that I do. Since I went through all this when my dad died, it was nice when people offered their sympathy. I wasn’t offended when someone said that they were sorry by any means, but when someone took a little more time to offer their help or anything like that, it just helped me get through it easier. And if I personally knew the one who died, I try to say something like “He sure did make me laugh whenever he would ….” or “I remember when she told me such and such…” Good memories to be shared of course. And I always let them know that I am thinking of them and their family.
Anyway, I was just curious to see what everyone else does when they are in this situation.