[15 May 2007 | Tuesday] 9:18 PM
- paper mache, mirrors, living dreams, and e-tickets
I suppose this blog can be blamed on vocal production class last night. We had to pick songs for our final solo, and one girl found one called "Disneyland"....and it was practically the story of my life. How everyone says it's for kids, that it's all fake, that it's just a dream....but I like the dream. I love the dream.
No one gets it, really. I'm just one of thousands of people with more than just a 'love' for Disney....and that doesn't make it special for me.
What makes it special is the fact that I have a reason.
I'm not sure if this is really it. I don't know anymore. It's all smooshed together in my head with so many things, I'm not sure if what I thought as my reason for loving Disneyland is really why I love it. But, when I was a kid, I was apparently miserable. I remember having a fairly okay childhood, but I've been told I came home crying on numerous occasions from school, none of which I remember--so, I guess because I apparently blocked some things out, things weren't as good as I remember them being. All I know is, whenever I would go to Disneyland, it was like the world was erased. I could forget anything going on and just have fun....and this carried over into my teenage years. I've never, ever had a day where I went to the park and came home thinking "This was the worst trip to Disneyland I've ever had." Granted, statistically there has to be a worst day, but....what, the day the power outage happened and all the rides were backed up? That sucked then, but in retrospect it was way cool. I got to experience that. I got in line for Mansion and it broke down while I was in the hallway to limbo...bad?--no, actually, that was cool, I got to see some backstage stuff and walk through the emergency exit.
I'm not sure what the point of this blog is. I know I'm rambling. But it's something I can't really escape. The song from last night, it...it made me cry. It made me feel less alone. It made me feel like I'm not the only one who has used it as an escape, not the only one who enjoyes getting lost in the smoke and mirrors. I'm sitting here listening to music from the rides and I'm almost crying, because I love it so.
A lot of people I talk to about Disney think that I have some issues, that I need to grow up. I don't want to. I want to stay lost in that childhood dream....
that with a wish, I could have a magic carpet ride
that someday my prince will come
that I could be the number 1000 to their 999
that if you wish hard enough you can go to the ball
that one kiss will wake the princess
that everyone has a laughin' place
that it's a small world
that fairies and pixes are real
that the space age is tomorrow
that you can find love and save that beautiful disaster before the last petal falls
that you can fly with a happy thought
that no matter your age, the magic will stay real.
I'm crying as I write this, but I never want to lose that magic. When the real world gets too tough, I like having Disneyland as my escape. Call me immature--I'll just call myself a believer.
Currently listening : The Battle For Everything By Five for Fighting Release date: By 03 February, 2004 4 Comments - 8 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove