WDW Conspiracy Theories

**Pizzapants** · 05-07-2005, 07:56 PM

Alright, this is just a thread to have some fun on, totally inspired by Coastierox's Finish the Sentence Thread. Let's see what kind of crazy stuff we can make up about what's going on behind the scenes at Disney World. Why is the Wonders of Life really closed? What really goes on in the tunnels below the Magic Kingdom? (the trick is to use a smidgen of truth) Alright GO!

**Coastierox** · 05-07-2005, 08:01 PM

The River of Time in Mexico is where they keep the defective Small World dolls.

**Pizzapants** · 05-07-2005, 08:11 PM

This is morbid...but true...and i'm sorry you have to read it, but after the park closes, all children "accidently" left in Animal Kingdom are fed to the Carnotaur on Dinosaur.

Children left in the Magic Kingdom are obviously doomed to an eternity singing "It's a Small World after all!.."

Children left in the Studios are trained to pull the elevators up and down by pullies on the Tower of Terror. There's no "random" computer system!

Children left in Epcot...are torturd by having to watch every single showing of "O Canada" in the Canada circle vision theater!

So please, watch your kids, and be sure not to leave them in the parks after closing. thank you.

**Speedway** · 05-08-2005, 02:50 AM

On Main Street, the princesses of the Magic Kingdom hug and kiss their young children subjects, making their dreams come true. Underneath the Magic Kingdom, the princesses gossip and bitch about how the woman playing Ariel really packed into her purple shell bra while she is at the cafeteria getting fish fingers.

**Coastierox** · 05-08-2005, 05:54 AM

HAHAHAHA!!!! I bet that one is mostly true though.

**Coastierox** · 05-08-2005, 05:57 AM

The reason that the AK closes so early is that it takes a really long time to change the batteries on the animatronic animals on the Safari ride.

**Speedway** · 05-08-2005, 09:17 AM

Al Weiss and his wife go for 'romantic' dinners for two in Mickey's house in at the Toontown Fair.

**Coastierox** · 05-08-2005, 09:28 AM

The children in the Small World where all drunks and substance abusers prompting Disney to put the ride in "rehab."

**Speedway** · 05-08-2005, 09:37 AM

**migitmouse88** · 05-08-2005, 09:53 AM

i heard they were planning on replacing Hista down at epcot with eisner 3-d

**Pizzapants** · 05-08-2005, 10:58 AM

Originally Posted by migitmouse88

i heard they were planning on replacing Hista down at epcot with eisner 3-d

Nooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

No one really knows this, because they try to keep it under wraps, but Body Wars is sponsored by The Church of Satan. Gruesome isn't it?

Also, for a short time after Epcot opened, there was no Outpost in World SHowcase. Instead, it was a Poland pavilion, but the Germany pavilion kept trying to take it over every night, so Poland backed out, and Disney was forced to replace it with the non-threatening Outpost.

**Gostone** · 05-08-2005, 11:09 AM

Oh my, this is really funny...

Everyone knows from riding The Land that most of the produce the park uses is grown on property in the gardens but a little known fact is that AK is the farm for the meat portions of the meals about the parks. The Living Sea supplies the fish for the Sushi in the Japan Pavillion and the other seafood eateries about WDW.

-Gostone

**Pizzapants** · 05-08-2005, 01:14 PM

Originally Posted by Gostone

Oh my, this is really funny...

Everyone knows from riding The Land that most of the produce the park uses is grown on property in the gardens but a little known fact is that AK is the farm for the meat portions of the meals about the parks. The Living Sea supplies the fish for the Sushi in the Japan Pavillion and the other seafood eateries about WDW.

-Gostone

Hahahaha!!!! Ohhhh, this one did me in!

And since we're on the subject of food, something happened in Animal Kingdom a few years back, and Disney hid it well so as to not get much media attention. As it turns out, back when Dinsosaur was Countdown to Extinction, the Carnotaur's hunger-suppressant pills wore off and it ended up eating a few guests on the ride. To solve the problem, disney changed the name of the ride to Dinosaur, associating it with the children's movie out at the time, so people would think it was a totally different new safe ride. It worked.

**TheDisneyInquisitor** · 05-08-2005, 06:58 PM

Originally Posted by Pizzapants

Children left in Epcot...are tortured by having to watch every single showing of "O Canada" in the Canada circle vision theater!

I thought this kind of torchure was made illegal by the UN.

Due to high guest demand, the motion simulator part of Star Tours will be removed and replaced by a movie featuring just Jar-Jar.

-Michael