You’ve Got To Be Kidding is humor. Allow yourself a chuckle and join in on the fun.
We all read lots of articles and books and columns and blog posts and comments and discussions and other brilliant, less-than-brilliant, and flat-out-ignorant publishings about Disney. But, when all is said and done, most of these are just people’s opinions. They often include a lot of background work using reliable sources, but they still represent nothing more than each individual author’s personal interpretations. What we Disney fans need is well-documented, tested, and juried analysis regarding the world of Disney. Toward that end, allow me to present, for all you blossoming doctoral candidates, some suggestions for theses related to Disney parks.
Ignoring Natural Impulses: Yes, there is an Inverse Relationship Between the Line You Choose and the One that Moves the Quickest
An Analysis of Fluctuations in Temperatures Throughout Disneyland Toward Identifying the Secret Location of Walt’s Frozen Body
Practical Applications for Pattern Recognition: There’s More Hidden Mickeys than You Thought.
A Holistic Approach to the Appreciation of Disney Attractions: Seriously, Storybook Land Canal Boats is Just as Good as Space Mountain
Can Tom Sawyer Swim: The Effects of Global Warming on Disney Parks
A Comparative Analysis of Average Times a Sleeper is Left Alone in the Park toward Determination of the Best Place to Take a Nap
Did I Hear What I Thought I Heard: The Percentage of Guests Who Know Rock ‘N’ Roller Coaster Includes the Song “Love in an Elevator”, as Well as the Percentage Who Actually Know What the Song is About
To Buy a City Council: What Took Disney So Long?
Can You Hold My Place: The Cumulative Effect of Churros, Turkey Legs, and Burritos on the Average Guest’s Ability to Maintain Their Place in Line
A Character Study of KAP, the Kaiser Aluminum Pig
It All Starts with Superstar Limo: An Analysis of Guest Surveys, Reader Comments, and Historical Documents Toward Determining the Extinct Attractions Best to Avoid Upon the Inevitable Invention of Time Travel.
Splash Mountain: Wait, You Mean There Was a Movie?!
A Deconstruction of the Various Levels of Annual Passes Toward Proving the Inherent Value is Not Worth the Associated Expense: You’re Going to Buy One Anyway, Aren’t You?
A Balanced Disney Diet: Achieving the Minimum Daily Requirement for Fruits and Vegetables through Consumption of Dole Whip
The End of Times: Conclusive Proof that the Onset of Climate Change, Increased Terrorist Attacks, and the Proliferation of Other Scary Things in the World is Directly Related to the Introduction of Alcohol in Oga’s Cantina
The Growing Horde: How Many Princesses is Too Many
Disneyland vs. Disneyworld: Absolute, Positive, Unquestionable, Unassailable, Conclusive Proof that Disneyland is Better. Yes it is! It Really is! I’m Right and You’re Wrong. Nanner, Nanner, Neener, Neener. THBPBPTHPT!
I’m sure I’ve only scratched the surface. Feel free to provide your own suggestions and let’s get the research ball rolling.